Been in a few arguments recently. Not about anything important. Got some insight into what's going on with that on new year's eve. While arguing. Of course.

I realized that the arguments I have been having, have been with my friends that are "J's". I'm a "P". I'm talking about the Myers-Briggs personality profile test. J and P are the two ends of one of the axis's of the test. They stand for judging and perceiving. A J type person is constantly making up their minds about stuff. Even when it's not important that they do so. A negative way to characterize this is to call them "judgemental". On the other hand J people tend to see P people as procrastinators. P people always want as much information as possible in order to make the best possible decision. I was told recently that I "over analyze my options". Of course, this was my J friend that told me this. hehe.

All this is background information for the "insight" that I had the other night. So here it is: I realized that I wasn't so much arguing about a particular thing with my J friends. It was just that my "P sensibility is offended by the "J sense" of having to constantly decide things. Speaking with J people it seems as if they have their minds made up about so much that it seems as if the world to them must seem so black and white.

I'm wrestling with the tone of what I'm trying to say here. I don't want to come across as sounding like I think I'm right and they're wrong. It's not a question of right and wrong. It's a question of personality difference. J people tend to have their minds made up that their P friends are procrastinators. Whereas, P people tend to think their J friends make up their minds too quickly, are frequently wrong and tend to see things in black and white.

It's not that I'm trying to present the P perspective as the "right way to think". It's just that, since it's the way that I do think, I just happen to know more about it.

An example of this occurred several year ago in Vegas during the time of the Monica Lewinsky scandal. My friends were all arguing with me about Clinton. Saying he should be impeached for having [as Chris Rock puts it] "lied about a blow job so his wife wouldn't find out". I'm sure my friends thought I had an opinion. I didn't, but I was offended by how easy it was for them to make up their minds and this was what lead to the argument.

Now that I know about this dynamic maybe I can cut them some slack and let them make up their minds as quickly as they want to. And hopefully it can be ok for me to take as much time to form an opinion as I want to. Or even not to have one.

The world needs J's and it needs P's. It's can be hard for either to see, or admit this though...